“But it—the whole Scientology gestalt—as successful a tax free con as it has obviously been, is really not a particularly sophisticated one. The particulars can be pretty crude and It only works on dummies ultimately. It’s a “belief system” (or self-help religion if you prefer) for stupid people, broken people, friendless people, losers, and feeble-minded rubes.”
– Richard Metzger From “What Kind of Person is Dumb Enough to Become a Scientologist?” Dangerous Minds 20 May 2016
Joining a religion is a chance to escape yourself.
It can be a chance to become someone new.
Not everyone wants this.
When I first got myself into Scientology, it went something like this: “I’m a Scientologist now. I used to be a drugged out, out-2D, lazy, unambitious wog. But not any more. Now I’m a Scientologist!”
Then, I became an Ex-Scientologist. “I used to be a deluded, brainwashed cult member. But not any more. Now I’m an Ex-Scientologist!”
See the pattern here?
Here’s the question: Before I was a Scientologist, was I REALLY a drugged out, out-2D, lazy, unambitious wog? Or are these just cognitive distortions prompted by adopting the Scientology mindset? Did I just accept these self-invalidations because invalidating my old self worked to help me change into something I felt was better?
Did I adopt similar cognitive distortions on myself as a Scientologist after I got out of Scientology?
Self-invalidation and self-disgust for having been a Scientologist is a common result of trying to graduate from Scientology. In some places on the post-scientology Internet, it becomes an unspoken penance to be endured before we can truly be considered by others to be “out” and no longer a stupid and deluded cult moron.
The problem for Ex-Scientologists is that too many people on the Post Scientology Internet have such contempt and disgust for Scientology, and for the pursuit anything spiritual, that they are toxic to be around if you are trying to learn your own lessons from your time in. What people need, after they have discovered enough of the deceptions in Scientology, is a supportive environment for HAVING BEEN A SCIENTOLOGIST.
Disgust and Self-Disgust
I’ve recently learned that the fundamental purpose for the emotion of disgust – according to some – is to keep yourself and others from being poisoned, both physically and socially. But self-disgust poisons yourself, thus achieving the harm the emotion was meant to avoid.
Ex-Scientologists need to be aware of the emotion of disgust, and what they are directing it toward, and how often they feel it. Just like the article above, most commenters and message boards on Scientology are dominated by the emotion of disgust. Ex-Scientologists need to take care not to let disgust become a habit that you then turn on yourself after Scientology.
When you are disgusted, you are not capable of learning about the object of your disgust, and self-disgust is extremely damaging to post-traumatic growth as an Ex-Scientologist.
If you can’t find positive, non-shallow support FOR HAVING BEEN A SCIENTOLOGIST in a group of others, or from a friend, then you have to create it for yourself. Self-invalidation and self-disgust for having been a Scientologist blinds you to the very important lessons you have already learned by getting yourself into Scientology, and by getting yourself out of it, too.
Internalizing the criticisms of shallow assholes like Richard Metzger – and others – is a great way to go backwards in life.
Who you used to be is an important part of who you are.
Don’t trash it. And don’t let others trash it, either.
My experience too.. What i did was to go back to before LRH and recall those values i had then. What i wanted with my life, how would i vote, who did i like, who was my friends etc. Playing old music from the 80ś. Then is started on a Fresh and continued from where i left my own reality. 2 years later i have reconstructed my life and more. Mostly learning how to behave in public as, Now! a guy who is a reborn 50+ year old.
Good one Alanzo! and good to have you back 🙂
Thanks, Dice. It’s good to be back!
Metzger’s remarks made me bridle. I think asshole is a fitting descriptive. When I realized several years ago what a corrupt fraud Scientology was, I was done and out. I went through the deeply embarrassed, self-loathing phase but still had enough self respect to stay away from the sites full of angry, abusive and ultimately ignorant commenters (although some of those people show up everywhere).
I came to realize that those who would denigrate me and others who’d been involved with that cult, and who saw themselves as superior in some way, were in the greatest danger of themselves being trapped in an ideology, even if it was nihilism. Believing it could never happen to you is a symptom of complete lack of understanding regarding the whole cult experience. That ignorance is their Acilles heel.
The mistake in Scientology was thinking that you knew everything, and that is the same mistake outside of Scientology, as well.
Great comment, Kate.
Thanks for being here. 🙂
Alanzo